Dear HARRIETTE: I went on a good day last week. I encouraged myself to go to a networking event alone and ended up meeting an interesting gentleman.
We both decided to show ourselves, and throughout the night we talked about how we had just been together but were determined to do so. The conversation felt light but platonic, so when he asked me out for drinks afterwards, I agreed.
It was late at night and we were openly arguing and enjoying each other. We talked about other activities we could do and places we could see together in the future. We ate at one place and had drinks at the other two.
This was the most unexpected turn of the evening, and somehow we both forgot to exchange contact information! I think we were both a little drunk.
We exchanged perfect names, and as silly as it sounds I Googled this lovely man. I found that most of his professional information is available online, but no emails or social accounts.
Do you have any suggestions on how to find someone when you have little to go on?
– Lost Romance
LOST LOVE OF LOVE: The hopeless romantic in me wants to believe that the two of you will find each other if it’s meant to be.
In this day and age, it can’t be that hard to find someone. Think for a moment if you have any people in common. Is it possible that you know someone who does? If you can’t figure that out, be patient.
Dear HARRIETTE: My husband and I have been married for seven years, we do not have children.
At first we agreed to stop for a few years to enjoy married life just the two of us. As time goes on, I’ve realized that I enjoy not having the extra responsibility that comes with children.
We’ve been able to build a solid savings while still being able to travel on a regular basis. We make good money, but if we had a child, our lives would not be the same. I feel selfish for admitting this, but I don’t want to give up any of this.
My husband feels ready to have a baby. Lately, this difference has started to create tension between us.
She talks about being a parent with excitement, while I feel anxious whenever the topic is brought up. I’m worried if I’ll resent you for giving up the freedoms we’ve worked so hard to build together.
I love my husband, and I don’t want him to feel like I’m ruining his dreams for our future. At the same time, I fear that agreeing to have a child when my heart is not fully in it would lead to regret or resentment.
How do I talk to my husband about how I feel in this situation?
– It’s a conflict
DEAR COMMUNICATOR: Sit down and tell your husband the truth. Be completely honest and work on it.
Commitment is real when you have children, but it can be the most rewarding experience you’ll ever have. You must decide together if and when you are ready to take that step.
Harriette Cole is the founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people reach and make their dreams work. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
